imissyoulikecrazy,mycuckoo
You were goodness personified
Though you had no inkling
No grudges, agendas, ego
You gave without taking
When we were first together, i’d get upset that you so often started conversations with others in the first person. I’d say, “It’s not always about you.” You’d answer, “I’m an emotional person.” Later, I learned of your superpower, and what a fool I was. Your self-story starter and your incredible smile were your lure; the way you broke ice, related to people, they related to you; fast and fast friendships, innermost secrets. in the market, library, cancer center. east coast, west, sticksandrocks. famous people, colleagues, shlubs. school kids, adults, kittens. Your just-incredible Charisma. Your incomparable warmth. What you’d called emotion. The talent to put someone immediately at ease by putting oneself out there with not a smidge of ego. The unique ability to transition a stranger into a companion. You could charm Godzilla into telling his troubles. Moreover, he’d feel better for it.
You were beauty incarnate
Though you had no inkling
Those eyes, cheekbones,
face, figure
You were the most exquisite ever.
You were stunning beyond description. Radiance and curves with an incandescent smile. Your face was, is, and will always be the most transcendent vision I’ve ever been blessed to see. It’s why your imperfections were so precious. Those funny knees, lumpy and so incongruous on that statuesque figure. As incongruous as that heavy walk, as if Miss Universe were clomping down the runway. And as incongruous as our 2nd biggest contention, your vocal tendency to “wake up the echoes”. Other than leaving Boston, nothing upset you more than my stupid razzing you’re too loud. Like your knees and walk, I should’ve loved that it was pure Phyllis. I’m really sorry. Really.
I loved were the flannel nightgowns you wore. I loved when you put your hair up, and the feel of that little ponytail I would constantly flick back-and-forth. You falling asleep wherever and me leading my sleepy girl back to our bed. And I sleep on my stomach and you on your back, so I could slide my left hand, palm down, under the small of your back every night, so I’d know you were always there. Sometimes when I did that, you’d say, “You want something,” just before you’d turn over the other way and fall asleep. Sometimes you’d awaken to a nightmare and I’d say, “I’ll never let anything happen to you.” It’s the same fucking thing I said when you got the cancer.
i love you to the sky,myphyllis
no-one, in all of time, could possibly miss anyone as much as i miss you.
