phylvs.sports
this p.m., saw marathon arrests, ad for derby tomorrow, & celtics eliminated. so deleted pix post to write this. (more about phyl & all three in part two.) warning: this may confuse people from 44 states.
phyl was not a sports person. from whence we come that’s unusual. boston people, 5 year olds or old ladies, are seriously rabid sports fans. not like here, nor almost anywhere else. back home (we always called it home) there are three religions; catholicism, dunkin donuts, and red sox. hard to believe, but if the sox’d just lost to the yankees you rode on the subway or shopped in the market to silence. phyl was different. phyl could tell you the most obscure attribute of ted bundy or robin williams, but, to her, ted williams was a guy who built a tunnel. she knew about the pats’ superbowls only because of her mom’s love of “my tommy”. in ’86, like most people from new england, one strike away, she said they’re still going to blow it. we have it on home video. and like every person from new england, she called every person whom we ever knew from new england, that night in ’04. dating, i tried to impress the most gorgeous girl in the world, with by far the hottest tickets in town, at the very height of the craze, second balcony seats for which i had to wait in line 12 hours, with my mom’s or brandeis financial aid’s money, so we could both go berserko, among 13,909 berzerkos, tearing their hearts out for number 4, the singular-most-amazing-human in recorded history. but phyl, amidst the gardenful of standing screamers enraptured by bobby’s magic, was the only one seated, obliviously reading her agatha christie. The only reason my college friends said they put up with her disdain was that they all felt they could score points with garden girls they’d meet if they were already with a stunner like phyl. And the fact that everybody loved her. this all sounds insane, but this all is absolutely true. phyl was not a sports person.
sports here, the same. phyl was not a sports mother. every year for 15 years, she’d tell me i was taking our kids’ baseball games way too seriously. she’d always yawn, “who cares?” if they didn’t get the lead in the musical (proudly, you were 6 for 6) she would’ve cared. but, baseball? 0 for 6, or 6 for 6; (yawn)“who cares?” and to this day; like mother, like sons. whenever dad says anything sports, their attitude is (yawn)“who cares?”
there were however four, and only four times i can remember phyl paying any attention to sports 1.chs homecoming, 2.the kentucky derby, 3.the marathon 4.the hick from french lick.
1. chatsworth high school homecoming/city section football game of the year.
most of our family isn’t aware of phyl’s scholastic popularity and influence. phyl was senior class advisor at chatsworth high school, one of the top schools in the huge (and just awful) los angeles unified school system we’re so proud of her, as the only two-time parent booster president at agoura high and more than twenty-time school site and leadership counsel member at both chatsworth and patrick henry. In over 20 elections, she never lost. She was an absolutely brilliant speaker, always from the heart, always self-deprecating and selfless, without notes, and with so much passion that she won every time.
at chatsworth, as senior class advisor (namedrop, three of her seniors were kirk cameron and former patriots and now chiefs quarterback matt cassell, and, way most importantly, the girl who picked the little kids from the audience at the stadium concerts to go onstage with Michael jackson. phyl had arranged for adam to go up, but michael got sick, canceled, rescheduled six months later, and the girl had left the job…our usual luck). phyl ran student government, events and programs, dances, prom, and homecoming. at that time the two top academic schools in the biggest school district in the entire nation were chatsworth and taft. the two top football teams in the biggest school district in the entire nation were chatsworth and taft. if not for delasalle up north, and long beach poly down south, these’d be the two top teams in california, maybe the nation. they were playing for number one in the city. that year, taft eventually was undefeated city champions, chatsworth was the same the following year. add to that, no pro team in a football town, friday night lights are HUGE here anyway, and the schools hated each other.
it was friday night, chs homecoming football game vs. taft, and phyl was soon to be on the front page of the l.a. daily news and sports page of the l.a. times. phyl put on the band, floats, fireworks of the pre-game show. the teams on the field practiced. she announced the national anthem. EVERYBODY in both stands arose at attention, as did the chatsworth team on the field. the senior girl phyl had chosen started to sing. the taft kids kept on practicing. the chs side booed them. the parents of both sides were really upset. phyl was livid. she was interviewed by both papers, the school, the district on monday. front page, i still have it. everybody agreed it was taft’s fault. then taft’s fucking coach starr, then one of the top coaches in the nation, said no-one had informed him, nobody on his team had heard the announcement(which some of his kids got brave and denied), he’d never disrespect his country, and more bullshit blaming phyl, and it was in the papers again.
2. the kentucky derby.
when seattle slew won the kentucky derby, phyl was taken. he won the triple crown. he was undefeated. we drove to see his next race at hollywood park. he lost. Everyone knew how she was with animals. she always read horse stories. then around, smarty jones in ’04, she and adam began watching the derby. not just the race, but the whole four hour pre-race before, and the preakness and belmont too. i said i would take her there when we retired, but the best intentions of idiots like me….
3. the marathon
this one’s hard to write, so briefly, phyl was severely allergic to many medicines. a moron doctor prescribed her bactrim. red, fevered, in pain, i asked to take her to the hospital, he said give her benadryl. I took her anyway. She was in anaphylactic shock (how i knew it again, last year.) delirious, blood pressure, 35/28. Over 12 hours, 3 different doctors said she was not going to make it, but, as we know, she was the toughest cookie ever. no-one wanted to live as much as phyl. They brought in a kid and his allergy specialist. doctor tim horita saved her life and became our doctor til he moved away. Phyl asked to repay him. his dream was to qualify to enter in the boston marathon. My bff forever forever michael, formerly head of mass medical, and the best lifelong friend anyone could ever, ever have, though amidst the very worst of pancreatic, arranged for dr. horita’s number just before we lost mike.
4. larry legend
for most of boston, it’s 1sox 2pats 3b’s 4c’s. for us, it’s celtics first; that’s always been us. we’re in lakerland . my best gift ever from phyl was celtics shares. (I kept my celtics “ownership” papers on the wall of my classroom.)
phyl and i were last in line, boarding at logan. larry bird got in line behind us. we flipped, then, as so often, larry met phylwhowon’tbedenied.
phyllis: mr. bird, may i please get a picture with you?
bird: not now.
phyl: on the plane?
bird: certainly not.
phyl: where then?
bird(getting frustrated): no pictures!
phyl: but we’re from here, teach in los angeles, and i’d love to have a picture for my kids to see and to have in myclassroom…..
bird(exasperated): look, if you can get off the plane as soon as it lands (at lax), i’ll wait for you at the baggage.
when we were seated, phyl was excited. then i told her he certainly wasn’t going to be waiting for her, he’s notoriously private which is why he gets on last and the front row of first class. he probably tells the baggage thing to everyone, gets off first, and a valet gets his luggage.
the plane lands, and phyl being phyl, grabs my hand, goes through the passengers in front of us like bo jackson, gets to baggage, and there’s larry, “i was waiting for you.” i take the pic, he leaves.
as you’ll see another time, we have phyl’s pic with a lot of famous people, but she had only one hanging in her library.
